Standing at the Forest Edge

I stand at the edge of the forest looking out at the landscape before me. The possibility’s that it holds but finding it difficult to make that step into the sunlight to explore what’s before me. That’s how today feels the thought of being visible writing a blog to promote myself to access more clients. There’s something about that visibility, that showing of myself, that feels frightening.

The wanting to put myself out there but the comfort of the Forrest holding me back. Having a head full of ideas but them being pushed down because the judgement I might get. I sit here with my crown of procrastination on finding lots of other things do. Watching the ideas slip away and then feeling the disappointment of not doing something with them.

I know for me this all comes from a younger part that’s scared of being seen of being judged. She doesn’t want me to feel the disappointment I’ve felt in the past of not being heard maybe not feeling valued. She thinks it’s best to stay quiet, to live in the forest, in the quietness of the trees. She learned that silence was safer than visibility.

When were born, we’re this perfect little being open, connected, full of magic. Our hearts are pure and we’re wired for relationship to be connected, as we grow, we take on the world around us We take in our caregivers’ actions, their worries, their unspoken rules, their ways of coping. We start to create different parts of ourselves in response. Each part has a voice. Each part has a job. Each part is trying to protect in the way that it knows how.

Some parts hold us back, keeping us quiet so we don’t risk being hurt again. Some parts push us forward, wanting the limelight, wanting to be seen. None of them are bad. They’re doing exactly what they learned to do often from a very young age. But sometimes those parts don’t realise that we’ve grown. They don’t know we’re no longer that small child who had to stay silent or stay safe. They don’t know we have more choices now

The work is learning to recognise these parts, to understand why they show up, and to gently help them trust that things are different. It’s not about getting rid of them. It’s about helping them shift into new roles. Roles that support who we are today, not who we had to be back then.

It makes me realise that the Forrest isn’t a bad place it’s a place that’s always there for me. It’s been my shelter for a long time familiar, steady, protective. That I can have courage and step out of the tree line but always know that it’s there when I need it. It can be scary stepping into a new landscape without a map or guide.  Visibility can feel too bright, too exposing, too unknown. But the parts of me that once kept me hidden are slowly learning that I’m grown now. They’re learning that my world is different, and that I have more choices than I did when I was a child.

We all have parts that learned to protect us in ways that made sense at the time. And we all have moments were stepping out of what’s familiar feels frightening. Healing isn’t about forcing ourselves out of the forest. It’s about walking with our parts, helping them trust that we can explore gently, at our own pace.

Maybe courage isn’t a leap into the light. Maybe it’s one small step, taken with the forest at our back, carrying its wisdom with us as we move toward what’s waiting beyond the tree line.

If you’re standing at your own forest edge, unsure how to take that first step, you’re welcome to reach out. Therapy can offer a safe place to explore the landscape ahead, understand the parts that hold you back, and move forward with compassion gently and at your own pace.